Pretty much since Gavin was born, he's been in "mommy mode". And since he could start talking, it's become even more obvious. My favorite (though probably my hubby's least favorite), was one night when Gavin wasn't feeling well, and wasn't sleeping. Him and I were up for about 2 hours (of course started with the "mommy! mommy! mommy!" from his crib). I was exhausted, and there was no end in sight for him to fall asleep. I finally had to tap out and get daddy in there to try to calm him down. Here's an excerpt of what I heard on the baby monitor as I'm trying to go to sleep:
- "Buddy, Daddy's here"
- "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!"
- "It's ok pal, daddy's here. Let's rock in the rocking chair"
- "I want Mommy! I want Mommy! MOMMYYYYYY!" (more screaming, escalating louder)
- "But daddy's here, mommy's sleeping"
- "MOMMY!" ... (pause)... "Bye Bye Daddy... mommy!".
He actually stopped to look and wave at Brian when he said "Bye Bye Daddy". I had to laugh, and sigh, and get up and go see him. Of course as soon as I walked in there, the crying stopped, and he was fine. We rocked again until he fell asleep, and though I felt loved, a part of me cringed at what I'm sure my husband was feeling. Most times when G gets hurt, or needs something, he wants his mommy. "Mommy carry you" is one of his favorite phrases. I've always known that it wouldn't be forever, so I've tried to relish being wanted and needed. But now... the time has come.
It's "Daddy Time". Now he wants to show everything he does to daddy. He wants to sit in daddy's lap, and the other night for the first time he cried for about 5 minutes (with real tears) cause daddy wasn't home to tuck him in to bed. All he could say between sobs was "daddy!". I'm like "but mommy's here... ", in a vain effort to comfort him, eeking some of those feelings in that I'm sure my hubby has felt for the last 5 years. Last night was another shift... Usually Gavin only wants me to feed him his dinner, but not now. Now it's Daddy's Turn. He wouldn't take a bite, until daddy gave it to him. Though I do admit a tiny piece of me is a little sad, I am so happy to see Brian's face light up when Gavin "needs" him. It'll probably take a little getting used to, and I'm sure will even out at some point, but until then - I'll relish in the happiness I see on BOTH my hubby's and my little boy's face when I hear "Daddy Carry You.".
first day of first grade
10 years ago
Oh so sweet! I know exactly what you mean, I've had that same sense of relief - NHV is in my arms and calm - followed by a cringe for daddy, who must be feeling left out. It's so hard, especially when I need a break. We haven't made the change ... yet ... but I know it's coming, and I bet it'll sting ... just a little.
ReplyDeleteI don't know about that. Simran had the change for a little bit but she is back to asking only for me at night -- or when she falls down... But I can definitely see how he feels mostly and lately with me being pregnant -- he feels even more helpless. But truthfully -- i don't i will ever be ready for her to not need me.
ReplyDeleteI encourage it. Gwyn was a mommy's girl until around two and now I'd say she's pretty balanced .. except for when she gets hurt. I apparently am the only one that can make it better. I'm ok with that. Quint is already more accepting of Matt than Gwyn was at this age. Gives me hope :) It can be exhausting being the only one sometimes.
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